Greyhawkery Comics: Graz'zt Show #2

Happy Needfest Greyhawk faithful! It's been a hot minute, but I seem to have finally got cable access to the longest running show in the Abyss. If you missed the opening, I saved it for you in the links below. Until next time have a laugh and enjoy the holiday!

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Greyhawkery Comics: Graz'zt Show #1

Season's Greetings Greyhawkers! Today's comic is a surprise present for my readers. I used to do annual Needfest comics around this time of year (those who are new to my work check out my old Comics page) so I thought to bring one back as a semi-regular series. Anyhow, the regular comic rotation is taking a break during the holidays. Until then enjoy some evil festive fun for the next few weeks!

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Expressions in the Land of Ull

Well met, Greyhawkers! One of my absolute favorite Greyhawk source books is Anne Brown's Players Guide to Greyhawk from the 2E era. Among the many useful tidbits of Greyhawk lore and info on how to make a character set in the Flanaess, there is a section on expressions and sayings. This kind of stuff is a delight because it adds spice to your roleplay, further adding to the immersion of the setting. By now most of you have heard gems like "I Spit on the Old One", "Cold Iron Avail You", or "May the Axe Grow Great." Well in this post I am going to attempt to add to this cultural exchange with some custom expressions from the frontier land of Ull. Keep in mind Grey-scholars, these sayings are translated from the original Ulagha dialect of Ancient Baklunish, so the actual wording may or may not be accurate. Until the Starbreak!

"Yoll, Yoll, Yoll!" This is an ancient battle cry used by Uli warriors, predating their occupation of the Oeridian lands. It was most famously yelled by the united forces of Ull when it turned back the invading Brazen Horde at the Battle of Ulakand in 308 CY. Over time however, this specific expression has fallen out of popular use by the many khanates of Ull who have developed their own local battle cries. Only the small warband called the Wild Men still cling to this expression as they harass travelers passing though Ohkir Khanate. Note: this expression originally comes from Gary Gygax's novel Sea of Death, where for copyright reasons the land of Ull was renamed Yoll.

"I'd sooner go to Kester." The derision felt between the traditional northern nomadic clans of Ull, and their corruptible southern kin is no more evident than in this familiar saying which has now spread across the neighboring plains and steppes. Kester's reputation for danger and depravity lends itself well to this forceful rejection of an obviously perilous request. Example: "You want to go in the Tomb of Horrors? I'd sooner go to Kester!"

"The arrow has been loosed." Variations of this idiom are found throughout Eastern Oerik. In Ull, it is commonly asserted that once an arrow is launched there is no changing its course. To put plainly, it refers to a decision that is made which cannot be taken back. Example: "I told the sheik we will not give in to his demands. The arrow has been loosed!"

"Ride fast, ride far." Many nomadic tribes in the north of Ull will travel vast distances in a shorter time than most riders due to the strength and resiliency of their horse breeds. This expression of parting is quite popular among the khanates and has even found use by their distant kin on the Plains of the Paynims. The saying is also the rallying cry of the annual Najaam Trials (during Richfest), a cross-country horse race that brings honor to a rider's family.

"Come down from your saddle." This expression is used to imply someone is being stubborn or unreasonable and needs to humble themselves. This usually includes a subtext of violence. For context, it is customary in Ull for negotiations to be conducted on foot, mainly in the event combat breaks out to decide the matter. Example: "Seventy gold pieces for that old bow? Come down from your saddle..."

"Blood is strength." Ull is a land of internal strife with warring raiders and contentious nomad families. When Uli have common foe however, the entire domain will rally together behind a strong leader. The phrase "blood is strength" is thus used by locals as a rousing means of setting aside differences to deal with a foreign problem.

Your god did not follow you here." While not outright hostile, this expression is often invoked as a way to rebuke clerics and missionaries foolish enough to come to Ull. Uli are distrustful of religions in general believing more in spirituality centered on their ancestors. They do believe the gods exist but only harmful ones like Incabulos or Ralishaz pay any mind to Ull. Example: "Keep your prayers and begone beggar, your god did not follow you here."

D&D Movie, Vecna Merch and More

Hey Greyhawkers! So we all know there is going to be a D&D movie soon. Some rumors say late 2021, but IMDB seems to think 2022. Hard to tell in the COVID era. Could end up straight to Netflix. This is an early synopsis of the movie (which in 2020 we found will star Chris Pine which I have mixed feelings about): 

"The upcoming Dungeons & Dragons movie currently in development by Paramount will focus on a group of adventurers looking for the Eye of Vecna, a powerful artifact that dates back to the earliest days of the game. Our source indicates that Dungeons & Dragons will feature a group of adventurers led by Raven Hightower, a warrior with a magic flamesword that’s haunted by his sister’s death. Other characters include the “half-dragon” Hack Karroway, the gnome thief Olivan Trickfoot, and a masked warrior named Alyssa Steelsong who is set to take over Palarandusk’s role when the dragon dies. Additionally, the main villain of the movie is a male drow named Razer Horlbar who once kept Raven and his sister as slaves, along with a female tiefling named Damala and a brutish warrior known only as “The Beast.”"

This hits quite a few modern D&D hallmarks, tieflings, drow (Razer tho?), dragonborn (I assume) and sassy gnome thieves. Nevermind that this will be tentatively set in the Realms (the dragon Palarandusk is evidently from that setting), knowing Hollywood they will botch it. At any rate, I've lately been intrigued by two correlating things, one, the rumored plot involves the Eye of Vecna and two, the fact Wizards of the Coast (and Wizkids) is pushing Vecna merch suddenly. I'm not going to link to the march sites though, I'm just showing this stuff. You can easily find them on your own if you're interested. Check it out:

Posted on Twitter, coming soon, trophy Eye and Hand of Vecna by Wizkids. This will set you back quite a bit because of the anti-magic jar I assume. I definitely dig the Vecna cosplay, I'll give them an A for originality. Would've been an A+ if he had only one eye though!

In the Christmas issue of Dragon+ (the digital descendant of old print Dragon Magazine) Wizards showcased a bunch of stuff, among them this sweet shirt. Now this I can get behind. Vecna is going to get more merch soon, you watch. This movie might feature the eye, but you can't really do the item justice without the Hand, so plot device for D&D 2? Once you have both items, Vecna himself can't be far behind! In the meantime, here is some other Greyhawk-y merch from that Dragon+ issue (more of a product catalogue really):

    Warduke. There is a TON of D&D themed shirts out there on the interwebs. This one speaks to me as does anything D&D cartoon related. 

Sure you have dice, dice bags, dice towers, DM screens and all the rule books, but do you have a D&D backpack to carry them in? I bet you don't!

Lastly, courtesy of Joe Manganiello and Death Saves is a sweet St. Kargoth "Death Knight" jacket. I know a few Greyhawkers who would die to have this.

That's all for now. Let's hope the movie comes out sooner than later. Between comic book movies, LotR, Game of Thrones, and Star Wars, this has been a golden age of nerdom in my opinion. Fingers crossed that D&D becomes even more pop-culture. 

Top 10 List: Greyhawk Holiday Modules

Merry Needfest Greyhawk fans! After recently producing those wildly popular Sea Princes maps, I've hit a dry spell, so let's have some fun with this post. In honor of the holiday season let's do an easy Needfest spoof. I used to do Needfest Special comics all the time until I hit a wall (common occurrence, entertaining is hard work!) Back then I had a habit of making my holiday comics with a chaotic evil bent. With that in mind, sit back with a cold drink as I regale you all with this scorcher broadcast to Greyhawkery all the way from the depths of Abyss. Enjoy!

Happy Needfest 2019

HAPPY NEEDFEST GREYHAWKERS! Back in the day when I did a weekly Greyhawk comic strip, my year always ended with a blowout special during the Christmas (Needfest) season. Many of you will remember my timeless classics, A Needfest Story or How the Gruumsh Stole Needfest. As I don't make these anymore (I ran out of material I think), the next best thing is to show them off again to a hopefully new audience of D&D and Greyhawk enthusiasts. So let the good times roll. Enjoy, this classic Needfest Musical Extravaganza from the misty memory of 2011!

Great Greyhawk Couples

 Happy Valentines Day, Greyhawkers! I don't think there is a Greyhawk equivalent to this holiday unless it's a holy day to Myhriss goddess of love. At any rate, that's a topic for another day. The World of Greyhawk is well known for its mega-dungeons, artifacts and warfare, but is it known for romantic storylines? Let's take a look...

Jallarzi Sallavarian and Kieran Jalucian: This is one of my favorite Greyhawk couples. Jallarzi is the only female member of the famous Circle of Eight in the City of Greyhawk and her paramour, Kieran is the Master of the Guild of Wizardry and Principle of the University of Magic Arts. I am going to assume they met when she was a prodigy student of his at the UMA because Jallarzi was 33 when she joined the Circle, and KJ only looks 30, but is clearly very old according to the City of Greyhawk boxed set. Scandals aside, I can see the attraction for them; Kieran is not only an archmage, but he has a 17 STR so he is no aged-wimpy sage. Jallarzi, described as "distractingly beautiful" has a 17 CHA and a pseudo-dragon pet. What's not to like? The pair are seen all over the city and even slum in the Old City in disguise with magic. Their wizardly careers are probably the only thing keeping them from being official. Work and well, that thing that happened in Return of the Eight...

Iggwilv and Graz'zt: Aww yes, you knew I would mention this couple (well off and on). They are the best confrontational pair in the entire setting. Iggy and Graz' even have a child together (spoiled demigod Iuz, such a dysfunctional family). Iggwilv is an aspiring demonologist-witch queen-conqueror. Graz'zt is an aspiring Prince of Demons-would-be conqueror of the Abyss. Clearly the pair's egos are not big enough to fit on one infinite plane. There is a lot of good game info on this diabolical couple I don't have the room to tell it all! Want to know EVERYTHING about Iggwilv though? Check out this amazing post on Power Score.

Cobb Darg and Elayne Mystica: I'm not sure if these two are a romantic pair, but they should be! Cobb is the old wily ruler of Irongate and Elayne is the albino Suel archmage of the same city. There has got to be a spark there, and I'm certain she knows Mayor Darg's secret heritage.

Queen Yolande and (various) Consorts: Elven culture might be different than human-kind in regards to courtly romance since they live so long and are many times xenophobic. Queen Yolande of Celene has had many consorts over the centuries, and the murder of one even started the Hateful Wars that drove all humanoids out of the Lortmil Mountains. I'm sure Yolande has moved on by now, though given her isolationist stand, does she ever look outside Celene for companionship?

Karin Keoffel and Yrag: I'm willing to bet you don't know who is Karin Keoffel. She happens to run the Fruit of the Mill in the lower part of Greyhawk, she is 44 years old and is cheerfully in love with her mercenary boyfriend "Yr". Whether she knows Yr is actually Yrag, a magically preserved 200 year-old adventuring legend is not known. What is for sure is that Yr/Yrag definitely loves his girlfriend and has gone to lengths to discreetly protect her, such as gifting magic items and telling the Guild of Thieves to back off her business. If that isn't love I don't know what is!

Iuz and Zuggtmoy: Iuz has many henchmen and allies he could choose as his consort, but in Greyhawk lore (and novels?), the Lord of Pain for some reason has an infatuation with Zuggtmoy the Demon-queen of Fungi. Despite being a power-couple they both have spent time in prisons, so their relationship has always been strained. Despite this I suspect Iuz loves her more than she loves him back. So much so, that Iuz literally gave Zuggtmoy his soul to guard on her abyssal plane. Like that won't ever come back to haunt him some day!

Lady Evaleigh and Gord or Alain IV of Ratik: The comely Evaleigh is a noblewoman from the County of Knurl and was featured as a love interest to Gord the Rogue in Gygax's early TSR novels. How that turned out, I'm not 100% certain, since I never read them all. Evaleigh however did make into the game setting as the widowed ruler of Ratik. She married the son of Baron Lexnol, Alain IV and he was soon killed by gnolls. Evaleigh had to assume rulership after Lexnol then became disabled upon hearing the news. Tragedy!

Wee Jas and Norebo: I would be remiss if I didn't mention this dynamic Greyhawk deity couple! Wee Jas the goddess of death and magic could only be won over by the roguish charm of Norebo right? After all he has been reputedly with every female deity it is said. Unfortunately, being gods of the Suel Pantheon, there's a good chance they are related! Why she puts up with him and his cheating ways in the first place is a matter of theological study. I know cause I've done plenty myself!

Honorable Mentions. I could go on and on, but here is some other couples I think would be worth musing about in future valentines posts...

Dragotha and Tiamat: Draconic love. Till death do they part?

Lorana Kath and Lord Kargoth: Both death knights of the Great Kingdom. A couple that works together!

Sotillion and Zilchus: Married deities of business, wealth and leisure. Gee, I wonder who they remind me of...

Markessa and Markessa: This Slave Lord likes altering the minds and bodies of elven women into doubles of herself. Self-love?

That's all for now. What other great Greyhawk NPC relationships are there?

Greyhawk Online Returns!

It's a Needfest miracle, Greyhawk fans! Thanks to my friends, particularly W.K. Nolen, the fan hosting site Greyhawk Online has been given a shot of life and a modern front page upgrade. Greyhawk Online was created as a sister site to Canonfire! to host pages for creative Greyhawk fans, such as Grodog's Greyhawk and my own World of Greyhawk comic strip that ran on GHO from 2005 to 2009 until I migrated over to Maldin's Greyhawk until 2011. Speaking of which, coincidentally the full run of 325 Greyhawk comics is now available on Maldin's Greyhawk and will eventually be updated on Greyhawk Online when time permits.

Old fans and new alike can revisit these familiar websites like mine, and perhaps even have their own creative content hosted (join the Greyhawk Wiki) or linked here to share with the rest of the Greyhawk community (see recent additions like the Greyhawk Channel and various blogs). So for Gygax's sake, check out GREYHAWK ONLINE now, you won't be disappointed.

Update 06/24/2021: Greyhawk Online is still going strong. New Oerth Journal issues have been produced and archived Living Greyhawk sites can be perused here. Thank you GHO.

Needfest Thank You Cards

It's almost the end of the year, which means it's time for me to look over my Needfest bounty of Greyhawk gifts and offer some thanks...

First, I am happy to say thank you to my Legends & Lore co-host Anna Meyer for a successful season on the Greyhawk Channel. We really killed it, averaging 20-30 repeat viewers per show. I made some new friends already through this show and even had great guest-hosts like Joe Bloch from Greyhawk Grognard. Wonderful!

Second, I'd like to thank my friend Scott H for giving me a copy of Hawk & Moor (trilogy 1) by Kent David Kelly. I never heard of this series, but its an amazing study into the life and history of Gary Gygax and Dave Arneson. Dry biographical reading material for a young audience, but for an old grognard like me, the Greyhawk references and origins are eye-popping. I can't wait to see more.

Third, gotta give a Needfest thank you card to DMShane for producing the Greyhawk Channel. The number of shows he now hosts keeps outpacing my blog, but my appreciation goes well beyond that to the community that's rallied around it I the form of a vibrant Discord group for subscribers (see the bottom of the page in the Twitch link above). He is even taking it to IRL as well, with a planned GenCon 2019 meet-up unlike any before. I wish I knew for certain if I were going.

Gotta give a fourth thank you card to the old-schoolers who are really building the community back up in other media. Bryan Blumklotz is a driving force with the Canonfire! Facebook group and I'm happy to see not only my old comic strip re-released, but also Bryan's heraldry back in the limelight. Then there is Greyhawk Online being resurrected by W.K. Nolen. Keep checking back for updates for Greyhawk content on this website!

A fifth Needfest card goes to Lord Gosumba for bringing his quite ancient 1E/2E Knights of Ulek campaign to the present day on Twitch. I'm sure he will be a big name in the community for years to come.

I'd like to thank Wizards with a sixth Needfest card for putting out Art & Arcana by Michael Witwer, Sam Witwer, Kyle, Newman and Jon Peterson (and Joe Manganiello). I've never been hyped about a coffee table book like this before. It pushes all my nostalgia buttons at the same time. I actually want the deluxe copy, that's how much I like this book. I highly recommend this work of art history.

Finally I'd like to give my last Needfest card to Scott Casper, for the Castle Greyhawk comic. For those who still haven't seen our effort, Scott wrote a fully-realized, well-grounded story set in the early Gygaxian Greyhawk setting. There is nothing else like this in Greyhawk fandom. It was a joy illustrating the adventures of Tenser, Yrag and Robilar. Now coming to an end in 2019, the final chapter will come with some bonus material for our loyal readers.

I hope everyone has a warm and fun Needfest this winter. Hopefully soon I'll be able to show off my holiday themed one-shot for my friends next week....stay tuned ;)

Thankful For Greyhawk

Greetings fellow Greyhawkers! In the United States we celebrate Thanksgiving by saying what we are grateful to have. When it comes to the World of Greyhawk community we should all be thankful for the growth of our fandom. Indeed, the Greyhawk Channel's own DM Shane is among those leading the resurgence:

"My dear new friends...

Crazy to say that, but it’s the truth. Most of our community is made up of new friends - new to me and new to one another. But reality is that just one year ago, we’d only aired one show. And only a few of you were there to watch it live. There was no Greyhawk Channel - just a small group of friends taking the risk to share their regular Sunday night game.

One year later… we’ve had more than 100 people play on the channel, nearly 20 different DMs, and have streamed more than 700 hours in the process. And @everyone thats super cool.

But waaaaay more cool is that there’s now a community of people who hang out together - supporting each other, foodporning together, sharing snacks and alcohol and crude humor together. Its a big group of good friends. And this is something none of us had a year ago. Its something we all built together.

I’m a blessed man. But this year one of my greatest blessings is something I didn’t expect, didn’t plan, didn’t see coming. Its you. All of you. This year, I’m thankful as hell for every one of you who help me look forward to every morning. You have made The Greyhawk Channel home. A home I deeply love.

This was year one. I promise you all another year of adventure, laughter, and friendship. Who’s with me?"

Who is with him? The Greyhawk community is still active and alive and can be found all over the map. In addition to the many fine DMs and players at the Greyhawk Channel I'm thankful to have:

Anna Meyer for the unparalleled Atlas of the Flanaess.

Dave Guerreri and staff running 5E Greyhawk Reborn.

Joseph Bloch for his foresight and the long-running Greyhawk Grognard.

Scott Casper for co-producing the Castle Greyhawk Comic with me as artist.

The Greyhawk faithful on the forums for Canonfire, Dragonsfoot and the Piazza.

Denis Tetreault for maps, lore and hosting my old comics at Melkot.

My friends Carlos Lising and Allan Grohe for running and producing wonderful professionally made Greyhawk games at conventions like Garycon.

Of course, my game own group for the Gamerstable podcast and putting up with my Greyhawk obsession.

The amazing Facebook groups, Sages of Greyhawk, Flanaess Geographical Society and also Canonfire a Greyhawk Resource for re-releasing my old comics to a new audience.

Lord Gosumba for keeping the old school alive on new media.

Return to the Bandit Kingdoms for being there with the streaming Greyhawk fandom.

Bards of Greyhawk for doing what no one else is doing in D&D fandom. Original music.

And to so many other creators of Greyhawk content and online entertainment that I can't recall you all, Happy Thanksgiving all and let's have a great CY 2019.

7 More Spooky Greyhawk Locations

Greetings, denizens of Greyhawk! In time for Halloween, I bring you a feature that I haven't done since 2014: 7 More Spooky Greyhawk Locations! If you haven't seen the last list, check it out here. As before, I'm not covering the too-popular Tomb of Horrors. It's scary yes, but the secret is kind of out by now. Death traps. Great Green Face. Demi-lich, etc. No, I aim to show DMs that Greyhawk has many eerie places to set a spooky-night's adventure. Enjoy!

Crypt of Lyzandred the Mad: This 2nd Edition Greyhawk module is actually part two of the forgettable "Lost Modules" series (Star Cairns and Doomgrinder). Written by the capable Greyhawk scribe Sean K. Reynolds, the only thing scary about this module is the dozens of puzzles you'll have to solve to get through it. By the time you find the namesake mad lich of the crypt, you'll have wished your character was dying in the Tomb of Horrors instead. This is not to say the module isn't redeemable. If you have players who are indeed above murder hobo-style play, then give them a taste of Lyzandred. You have been warned!

Icespire: Not happy with the previous review? "Let it go." Instead I present a place of environmental and mental danger. This keep in the South Province sits on the rocky coast of Dunhead Bay and once served as a light house for vessels until one doomed day in 565 CY. Stories suggest the mage in charge of running the beacon was interested in forbidden lore he allegedly discovered in caves below the keep. Whatever he discovered, the effects were instant and deadly, as the keep and the all the land around for several miles were permanently changed into a frozen wasteland. The Herzog of the South Province sent men to investigate and only two returned, and both of them were driven insane. Even attempts to scry resulted in madness. The lands of Icespire, as it became known, is perpetually cold; so cold in fact, that normal protection does not suffice. In the spring and autumn months, storms rushing in from the Sea of Gearnat make travel along the peninsula of Icespire is impossible even for the most well equipped expedition. 

Introduced in Ivid the Undying, this giant ice-blue shard overlooking the coast gives DMs and players a fun combo of problem-solving and investigating an eldritch horror. Is it a cursed artifact? A trapped god or elemental prince? A gate to another Plane? If so what creatures now lurk in the frozen wastes? Good luck finding out hardy heroes. 

The Secret of Bone Hill: Here's one I missed last time. The Secret of Bone Hill is a classic low-level module by Lenard Lakofka, and introduced in 1st edition AD&D. Bone Hill is a suitably spooky sand-box type module that is only the first part (L1) of a three module series (Assassin's Knot and Deep Dwarven Delve). Not convinced this place is eerie enough? The blurb on the cover says this:

"Danger lurks in the Lendore Isles. Bands of evil creatures prowl the hills overlooking the town of Restenford, seeking unwary victims. Now you have come to the sleepy little village looking for adventure and excitement. You seek to fathom he unexplored reaches of Bone Hill and unlock the mysteries of Restenford."

I have personally never played the Secret of Bone Hill, and I only recently acquired it, but I do intend to run it someday. I dare you to as well!

Bronzeblood Haunt: The good Kingdom of Furyondy is not spooky is it? Well, no, because most of the dangers here come from outside its borders (namely Iuz or the Horned Society). There is one notable exception however; the ruins of a castle referred to as Bronzeblood Haunt. As the tale goes, there was once a sadistic nobleman who consorted with things like evil cults and vampires. Naturally, matters got so out of hand in this fief that the king had the guy deposed and his castle was razed to the ground. Even after this overthrow, the entire area was left with an overwhelming aura of evil. The land is noted for eerie mists and unnaturally blood-red bronzewood trees during autumn. So far, no knight or hero has dared to explore the cursed dungeons of this ruin. Oh yeah, did I mention the crazed noble was never caught? Bronzeblood Haunt is featured in the 2E accessory The Marklands. This location gives a DM a chance to place a custom dungeon-crawl within a stable kingdom and not be overshadowed by any published modules nearby. Happy hunting!

Fleichshriver: Within the dominated Bandit Lands is a foul citadel called Fleichshriver (translated, flesh penance?) consisting of bent towers, barbed walls and gargoylian decorations. Featured in the accessory Iuz the Evil, this is a garrison for Iuz's forces as well as a ghoulish laboratory for Boneheart members Halga, Jumper and Null. If there is a unique evil spell or cursed magic item created in this empire, Fleichshriver is where it originated. Jumper experiments with shadow magic and Halga dabbles in the negative material plane in this castle. Worse yet, reports say Fleichshriver has a gate to the Abyss itself where demons are summoned forth to serve the Old One. There is few places in the north more dangerous to venture into than citadel Fleichshriver. High level adventurers take note. To vanquish Iuz and his lieutenants, this fell place may have to be brought down first. Good luck!


Plague Fields: Speaking of Iuz the Evil, another depredation of the tyrannical demigod is the Plague Fields. This keep within the former Shield Lands and unbeknownst to the forces of evil who wrecked it, used to be a vault for a profane artifact belonging to Pyremius, god of murder. The unfortunate result of this keep's destruction was breaking the holy wards on it. Now, all life that gets within miles of the ruin slowly becomes poisoned and diseased. Very few are hardy enough to tread upon the Plague Fields and if they do, what are they looking for? Surely not the artifact within...

The Dead House: Labelled T5 in your City of Greyhawk boxed set; in the 591 CY supplement, Greyhawk, the Adventure Begins. The Dead House was formerly Madame Serena's Fortunetelling. Venerable Madame Serena was of course one of those legitimate seers who had way too many cats and no one in her will. Rumors in the city, mainly from beggars who tried to sleep here, say that Madame Serena's ghost (or something) haunts this house. They hear stuff moving and voices talking. Priests have even investigated, but have found nothing to exorcise. This is a good location for DMs to pit their players in the iconic movie trope of staying the night in a haunted house. Is Serena's ghost harmful or helpful? Is it a poltergeist or something worse? Oh, and what hidden treasures did the fortune teller leave behind?

45th Birthday Week

Ahoy Greyhawk scum! Last week was my 45th birthday (groan) and while I didn't get anything useful done, I did have a good old time. 

My friends and I went to the local Renaissance Fair for the second straight year. It was a blistering, sunny 90+ degrees out but I drank beer, conspired with elves, threw axes, ate a turkey leg, was entertained by wenches and pirate bards and of course, we watched our favorite knight Sir Duncan on the jousting grounds. Might For Right! Naturally, I got a tricorn hat there and just in time for "Talk Like a Pirate Day" too! Here is a pic of me with my clay tankard from last year's fair. Arr! 

Later that weekend I dined outside at the local Harvest Fest with friends again. We followed this with an overdue game night, finally finishing the Sunless Citadel. The heroes fought valiantly against the evil druid and his minions.

To cap off my fantastical week I got some more loot. First my good friend Eric gave me a Wacom Intuos Art tablet. I've been wanting to up my digital art game for years but have been reluctant. This was the shove I needed.

Secondly, I acquired an old D&D Expert Boxed Set. It is missing the dice sadly, but the box alone is worth it. Included is the rulebook, Isle of Dread module (yes I own both already), an ad to join the RPGA and a cool 1981 TSR catalog (which I'll show off at another date).

That's all for now, but also coming soon I am rejoining my Gamerstable friends for our successful Kickstarter backed return from podcast limbo!

Update 6/20/2021: I'm due for my 50th birthday in 2022. I'm ready to do more fun stuff like this!

5E Greyhawk Magic Items

Well met, it's almost time for Needfest in the World of Greyhawk and I figured, what better time is it to gift a few 5E conversions upon the loyal fans of the Flanaess? These three magical treats come directly from the pages of the classic sourcebook, Greyhawk Adventures. It's my first stab at adapting magic items to a new edition on this blog, so it's important to point out that the material below is originally the work of James M. Ward and is of course wholly owned by Wizards of the Coast. Enjoy, and Merry Needfest!

Lucky Ring of the Wild Coast

Ring, very rare (requires attunement)

This magical ring was created by a wizard who liked to gamble, though his greatest gamble was to use it under the suspicious eyes of the Thieves Guild. The ring increases a gambler’s chances of winning, and is prized among the rogues of the Wild Coast.

   While worn, the user gains Proficiency in any ability checks using a dice set. Furthermore, you have advantage on any ability checks that involve gambling with dice only.  

Shield of Greyhawk +3

Armor (shield), legendary (requires attunement)

This metal shield bears Greyhawk’s coat of arms, and was created by the Society of the Magi. It now hangs in the audience hall of the Lord Mayor’s mansion, and is well guarded.

   While holding this shield, you have a +3 bonus to AC. In addition you can use an action to cast the dispel evil spell. The shield can’t be used this way again until the next dawn.

Lantern of Greyhawk

Wondrous item, legendary

This hooded lantern was found by looters in the abandoned castle of Zagig Yragerne, the Mad Archmage. Exactly why he used it remains a mystery, though many people suspect that it served as a guard against the supernatural creatures with which he dealt.

   While lit this lantern burns for 6 hours on 1 pint of oil, shedding light in a 30-foot radius and dim light for an additional 30 feet. As an action, the lantern bearer can shed a magical light for up to 10 minutes that renders all invisible creatures and objects visible. Likewise, out of phase and ethereal creatures and objects appear ghostly and translucent.
   This magic light also automatically turns or destroys undead within 30 feet as a 14^th level Cleric.



 

Autumn in Greyhawk

Hello Greyfriends, autumn is my favorite season of the year so let's have an esoteric look at what weather conditions are like on Oerth in the Domain of Greyhawk. The World of Greyhawk boxed set as most know has the most elaborate weather generation system in all of D&D. For this post however I'm going to break open Roger E. Moore's quite excellent book from 2e, Greyhawk: The Adventure Begins. In this sourcebook he streamlines the climate rules of Greyhawk with this sensible if not blunt explanation.

"A few words should be said about weather as experienced by the average adventurer. First, almost no one bothers to measure it. Thermometers are not in great use in the Flanaess because they are fragile and mercury is hard to acquire; only a few sages, priests, and wizards have them for research purposes. Instruments exist that measure air pressure, humidity, wind speed, and so forth, but again, these are considered the province of the learned and homebound, with little practical application given them by explorers, treasure hunters and adventure seekers. To be fair, nearly all lower-class commoners and even many nobles have a similar regard for the value of meteorological equipment."

On autumn in the World of Greyhawk; there is but two months considered autumnal here (not including Brewfest, the week long festival leading in to autumn). One of the best things about this setting is the variety of cultures and their own names for things. In the case of seasons, the first month (October to us) is called Patchwall, or Brightleaf in elven lands, Hare by the nomads of the northern reaches and Feast by the peoples of Hepmonaland. The second month is Ready'reat (November), also called Tinklingice by the elves, Hawk in the north, and intriguingly Lovers in the jungles of the south.

Using The Adventure Begins, here's the current autumn condition for Ready'reat in the Domain and City of Greyhawk (assuming average die rolls and chances of change):

Sunrise 6:43 am
Sunset 4:42 pm
(10 hours, which is noted as a normal day's march. Also, unlike temperature, apparently adventurers do keep track of time.)
Sky partly cloudy
Temperature cool (40-55 degrees if you must know)
Precipitation none but 42% chance of light to heavy rain tomorrow
Winds blowing from the south (must be the Woolly Bay effect).

Now because I'm curious and for comparison, I will use the Weather Generator from the Glossography:

Sunrise 6:46 am (3 extra minutes to sleep in)
Sunset 4:45 pm (3 extra minutes to prepare for vampires)
Sky partly cloudy
Temperature low 35, high 57 degrees (a bit colder but close enough)
Precipitation 40%
Wind 4-9 mph (the Glossography says prevailing winds in the Flanaess come from the north and northwest during fall and winter)

Overall not too far off, so the streamlined weather rule tables in TaB are definitely worth using for DMs who don't need too precise information. More next time!

10 Spooky Greyhawk Locations

With October and Halloween winding down let's have a look at some places in Greyhawk that are quite spooky - that is to say spookier than most adventure locations in the Flanaess. The Tomb of Horrors goes without saying so I'll go from there. In no particular order, enjoy!

1. C2, Ghost Tower of Inverness: For obvious reasons, this is always one of the first places that pops into my mind when I think haunted. Located in the Abbor Alz Hills, the object of this classic first edition module is for the numinous Soul Gem.

2. Dungeon of Bleeding Walls: This place just sounds nasty. Nominally set at map coordinates N3-64 in the Wastes, this dungeon is featured in the boxed set Iuz the Evil. It's a place of wererats, vampires and of course, acidic bleeding walls. Would you stay in a dungeon that was bleeding?

3. Necropolis of Unaagh: This eerie location set in the Bright Desert is from the sourcebook WGR3, Rary the Traitor. Unaagh is the ancient burial ground of the evil realm of Sulm, a place where virtually any kind of undead can be found and lording over all is the lich Drokkas who has aspirations to restore Sulm as an empire of death (watch out Rary!).

4. Saltmarsh: U1, The Sinister Secret of Saltmarsh is one of those seminal works of Greyhawk that every DM should run for their players once in their life. The story unfolds in the haunted mansion of an evil alchemist. No spoilers for this secret site, you'll have to check it out yourself!

5. Gibbering Gate: Set in of all places the Barrens, one of my favorite scary Greyhawk locations is the underrated insane asylum, Gibbering Gate. Found in the source book Iuz the Evil, this citadel is run by the illusionist Jumper and includes many demons and undead, notably a balor who presides over the Court of Delirium. This is a good spot for a DM to stick high level PCs who offend the Old One because they might get out but not with their sanity intact.

6. Halmadar's Crypt: The 2E module Vecna Lives! is a high level study in the use of horror and overwhelming evil. The mood is set early on as the story begins at the crypt of Halmadar the Cruel in the Kron Hills. The fact the Circle of Eight is doing the investigation is your first clue this is a place normal folk shouldn't poke around in!

7. WG4, Forgotten Temple of Tharizdun: Lost amid the vast Yatil Mountains, there is no place on Oerth that best embodies the strange madness inducing themes of H.P. Lovecraft than WG4. What starts as a standard dungeon becomes quite harrowing the farther in your explore. This module is only for the bravest PCs and the most demented DMs.

8. The Caves of Deadly Shadows: Found in the 2E boxed set From the Ashes, this Yatil Mountain location set in hex R5-81, just sounds like a terrifying place to lure characters into. Besides the normal hazards of spelunking, there is your normal variety of undead shadows here as you would expect. But that's not all! The caves are also home to many other kinds of shadowy creatures, all ready to pounce on hapless heroes such as shadow dragons, skulks, nabassu and yes even the characters' own shadows. Yikes.

9. Maure Castle: The site of WG5, Mordenkainen's Fantastic Adventure, is in my opinion, easily more fearsome than its more well-known neighbor to the west, Castle Greyhawk. The denizens and dangers of this place, from the Great Iron Golem to wandering bodaks and the guardian demon Kerzit are unconventionally scattered so that foolish heroes may not expect trouble until it hits. Expanded upon in the pages of Dungeon Magazine (#112 and beyond), there is a creepy backstory to the Maure family that underlies the placement of every room and treasure in this megadungeon.

10. T1-4, Temple of Elemental Evil: Naturally this place is among the scariest locations in Greyhawk. The original cover of this module is easily the most frightening in all the game, if not D&D itself. Nestled in the wilderness near the good nation of Verbobonc, we've all heard the Temple's story and this place has been returned to on more than one occasion across the editions. Much like WG4, this module deals with evils so iconic and powerful it defies logic why any sane person would go into this place.

Merry Needfest!

Ah yes, it's the time of the year when I look back on Needfest comics. One of these years I really should write something new like a Needfest Carol, or the Nightmare Before Needfest, or perhaps an action comic like, Die Vecna Die Hard! Well until the right inspiration hits me I'll have to replay the Greyhawk classics like they do on TV every year.

My favorite of course is a Needfest Story. The true untold story of those secret times.

Another labor of Needfest love is How the Gruumsh Stole Needfest. Read this and you'll never look at orcs and elves the same way.

Lastly, I recommend my first Needfest Musical Extravaganza. Parodying music lyrics is quite a challenge, but with Lydia's help I got through it three years in a row!

Enjoy and Merry Needfest, Greyhawkers!

Greyhawk Round-up

Howdy Greyhawk-files. Here is a quick round-up of Greyhawk related things going on:

At Canonfire, the third part of Ragr's Greyhawk fiction series The Knot is available for your perusal. Ragr writes:
"Life flies by and when it does, Greyhawk waits for you."

Follow the links to read the most current or previous episodes.

Also at the Canonfire Crier, check out Argon's post about lesser known holidays of Growfest.

At Wizards people have been buzzing about cartoonist, Jason Thompson's wildly detailed and humorous "walk-thru" maps of classic modules. So far he has done White Plume Mountain and the Tomb of Horrors. A walk-thru of Expedition to the Barrier Peaks is coming soon. Check these out.

Speaking of the Tomb, Greyhawk Grognard reviews the old D&D novel Tomb of Horrors by Keith Francis Strohm. That is a book I've yet to read, check out the post for more info.

Dennis Higgins' Hyborean Greyhawk blog has done it again. His campaign notes for combining Howardian worlds with Greyhawk interests me to no end. Now he has turned the world on end (or sideways) in a way I've never seen before. Have a look see.

Anna Meyer has been hard at work on her Atlas of the Flanaess. In her blog she has recently posted first maps of Gran March, Geoff and the Valley of the Mage. I can't wait till she gets to the Hold of the Sea Princes! It's a map I'll be needing fairly soon...

Update 05/13/2021: This post didn't age well. I had to move the links to Thompson's artwork. The articles are gone but I'm sure the art is on the net somewhere. Hyborean Greyhawk is defunct sadly. Link removed. And Anna's website has changed, so instead of individual map sections you'll have to refer to her newer, better work.

Update 08/25/2021: I broke down and bought Tomb of Horrors novel. Looks good so far. Strohm uses the map and lore quite effectively.

Avast! It's Talk Like a Pirate Day

Arrr mateys, this be the 19th day of Harvester! So what, you say? Scurvy rat! You should walk the plank or be flogged thirty times against the mizzen-mast! See, for ye landlubbers it might just be Waterday, but for we salty sea dogs from the Sea Princes' Hold it is rightly a holiday. Now grab a bottle of rum and join in the fun, or I'll see you keel hauled!

Here be some pirate treasures to get ye in the mood. Arr!

A Greyhawk Article, Maps and D&DNext

Ahoy, fellow Greyhawkers! Time for me to catch up on things going on in the community:

First off, over at Greyhawk fansite, Canonfire, we have a new article up entitled Tragedy and The Grey Friar. This is the third article from the ominus author Dark Lord Galen. In this piece he presents a bit of fiction, a local fable, then some good St. Cuthbertian lore to tie it all together for your home campaign. This article is a quick and leisurely read, so check it out!

READ THE ARTICLE HERE

Next up is a report on the completion of Greyhawk Grognard's whirlwind tour of Western Oerik for his "Beyond the Flanaess" hex map project. His last leg rounded the Barbarian Seameast and connects with the desert lands of Erypt. To cap it all off Mr. Bloch has also created an easy compressed file download holding all the maps in the series. Well done Joe! I can't wait to see where he goes from here.

Lastly and no less important is my obligatory post about Wizard's open playtest for D&DNext. Most blogs I follow (which tend to be the old school leaning) are speaking favorably about these rules so far. It shouldn't be too hard to find online, a heap of commentary and hardcore analysis on the playtest materials, so I'll leave that to the rest. My own home campaign uses 3.x core books with touches of older editions so I'm guessing my players will probably react favorably to these playtest rules. I'm also signed up to play in a D&DNext game at Gencon in August, so that'll be interesting. We shall see. More on the rules to follow once I get with my gang about it. To those in the states, enjoy your Memorial Day weekend!

Update 05/07/2021: I removed the link to Joe Bloch's BtF map series, because its not currently hosted on his new site. Keep checking or send him an email if you'd like to inquire about this map (teased in the cartoon above).

Happy Mother's Day...

 


...to witch-queen IGGWILV, mother of Iuz, demigod of evil and his half-sister the vampiric vixen Drelzna. Whether going by the name Hura, Louhi, Ichbilch or Wilva - no woman in Greyhawk canon has done more to build up and support her family. From conquering Perrenland to exacting revenge on her children's deadbeat fathers to penning a best-selling series of Demonomicons, Iggwilv is always in the background scheming for the future. Not even death or imprisonment in the abyss can keep this ambitious mother down.

Iggwilv's legendary rise to Greyhawk infamy is especially remarkable when you consider she was once just plain Natasha, a simple village girl. That is until the day she was "adopted" by her new mother, the Mother of All Witches, Baba Yaga. Raised in the Dancing Hut, along with her goody-two-shoes sister Elena the Fair, the girl became Natasha the Dark. Now trained in the arts of magic, demonology, and womanly wiles, Natasha was unleashed upon Oerth by her foster mother. It is not recorded what happened afterward to Elena or any of the young witches who surely came before and after them, but it's safe to say Iggwilv is Baba Yaga's greatest legacy.

Iggwilv has always been a major interest in both my Greyhawk campaigns and my old Greyhawk comic. Here is a few highlights from her comedic misadventures:

Debut in the comic
Iggwilv cameo in Dungeon #149
Iggwilv's Legacy
Greyhawk Grumbler tie in
Twelve Days of Needfest